Via Rosemont, Illinois. Original airdate: 5/17/09
Umaga d. CENTIMETER Punk, Samoan Spike — pin (***1/2).
So why is Umaga battling Pepsiman anyway? Anyways, hometown secret applies here as Punk does the job, though it was an excellent terme conseillé otherwise with lots of nifty spots like G2S countered into a Samoan drop. I don’t understand WWE’s obsession having their talent ALWAYS lose in their hometown, unless if you’re Jim Ross, then you aren’t embarrassed over a grand size. 123wwe
ECW champion Christian g. Jack Swagger, handful of tights — pin (***1/2).
I really enjoyed this match and loved when Christian jumped down from the top rope over Swagger and ran to lack of haha… traditional Christian. End came when Swagger opted for the gutwrench powerbomb, but Xian switched out, opted for the killswitch, as Swagger pulled away, then Xian did a rollup, with a small number of tights FTW and further the feud. I suppose Christian is the new dirtiest player in the game. Sort of a lame ending, though. Also bad Christian isn’t “popular” enough to have a clean win.
Meanwhile, Advantage and Chavo argue. Border told Chavo to do something about the cross-dresser calling his aunt a pig. Edge is amazing and one of the better actors in WWE. He can make a mediocre promo amazing by the way this individual gives it.
John Morrison d. Shelton Benjamin, Starship Pain — pin (***).
Sadly Charlie Haas has dropped the impersonation trick. While I’m excited to view the World’s Greatest Marking team reunited, The Great Charli > WGTT. Anyways, this is a good match, but it was missing something. Maybe it was the crowd; they didn’t quite seem to be to be buying Nitro as a face. Anyhoo. great stuff at the end as both guys strike some beautiful spots and in the end Nitro wins with his flippy spinny indy move. Both equally these guys need more match time; they can put on a heck of any show.
Comedy part saw The Miz right up jack Alfonso Soriano at ringside and says Jannetty (which was a nice reference), couple of Geese, Chicago Cubs & SMH. Then bizarrely, Santino makes the save for Soriano and calls him The Fiz. Raw’s two most hilarious wrestlers against one other? They should keep that going. A Miz-Santino argument would be priceless.
Global champion Rey Mysterio g. Chris Jericho w/ brief pants, 619 — flag (***).
Jericho is getting stale, he should go back to his smarmy and arrogant ways like his WCW days. Anyhow, Jericho throws Mysterio surrounding the ring like a throw away doll and Rey is soooo small compared to Jericho, I don’t think Y2J could make this feud work because than it. Anyhoo, the match might have been average if Jericho hadn’t done the promo with the ‘guarantee’ that there wouldn’t be a 619; gave a tale to the match. And I usually hate Mysterio matches, because they’re so formulaic, but that was a good match, as a result of Jericho. Rey is an overall total shell of his former self, however. The announcers talk about how precisely he’s a “high-flyer” but he hardly does that anymore. He should leave the workplace so they can walk 10 years from now.
Flying Batista d. WWE champion Randy Orton w/ out hair, attacking the referee — DQ (*1/2).
Finally, a toilet break in the action match. Orton can be okay, but needs someone to help him, and that man is not Batista. Same is true of Batista. They just cancel the other person out. Anyways, there were a sizable RKO chant which was not a pro-DAVE crowd. This match just sucked the energy away of the show. Both these guys are like online video game characters. Repetitive goes, awkward animations, over extreme normal mapping, and sometimes victim to lag. If perhaps Orton’s finishing move was a headlock, he’d succeed every match. End emerged when Orton deliberately acquired himself disqualified, attacking the referee in a cheap ending. Those kind of finishes just make you wonder why he don’t slap the referee two seconds in the match and leave. Post-match, Legacy arrived down to attack Big Dave, but a 92 year old man makes the save. Whoo. Dammit Flair, stay retired.